One year ago, I took charge of my life, based on some advice I got from Sekhmet. Best thing that ever happened to me. Shortly after that, I thanked her, and told her that I admire her greatly and appreciate what she did for me, but I don’t think we would work well together.
I don’t think she’s more intimidating than many other gods, so it’s not that. It’s that we have very different personalities, and just wouldn’t mesh. So I told her I like her but don’t want to work with her, and we went our separate ways.
And then at 4 am last night / this morning, as I’m trying to fall asleep, this happens:
random thought: hey, tomorrow is our anniversary.
me: um, it’s the anniversary of that event. It’s not “our anniversary”, we don’t have a relationship.
me: shit it’s our anniversary and I have nothing planned.
(Once again, I don’t get words, I’m just translating impressions into words.)
In hindsight, I may have been getting hints for a week or two, but sometimes I’m a little slow on the uptake.
Well. Normally I don’t care about anniversaries. Usually I don’t even know when they are, but in this case, seeing as it was such a life-changing event, I feel it deserves some recognition. Last minute planning, GO!
I feel like the odd one out among Sekhmet kids, when my reaction is “Okay, this is happening, let’s do this!” (as opposed to the resistance I see from everyone else) but it’s just the way I am.
The other thing I want to say is how much I am in awe of her. I didn’t want to work with her, didn’t think I could, so she left me alone to do my own thing for an entire y e a r. If that’s not patience I don’t know what is. I mean, I know a year is probably not very long for a deity, but when other people talk about this sort of thing, they always either get dragged in, or walk away. So while I have no doubt that gods could wait if they wanted to, it’s simply not something I ever hear about. But this was exactly what I needed, to know that we would get along.
And now I’m happy to have her in my life. It’s not even a matter of choosing; there’s nothing to choose, it’s already a done deal. It’s an interesting feeling, because on the one hand, this was kind of unexpected, but on the other hand I feel like, of course this is how is, how else would it be?