There were some things I wanted to write about, but I’ve been too tired to put a blog post together, so here is a summary of the past few days:
I have my own space now, so I finally got to reach out to the Netjeru, and I’m very happy about that.
I invited them in, offered some tea and chocolate, and introduced myself. Well, I kind of fumbled the introduction; when I started talking, I suddenly forgot everything I wanted to say, so there was a period of “umm…uhh…umm…” followed by rambling on whatever random topics I could think of.
I didn’t want to talk about sad things on our first meeting, but I couldn’t think of anything else to say, so I kinda started talking about something that’s been weighing on me lately, and then I started crying. Not what I had in mind for a first meeting. I tried to get back to a happier topic by playing some music and talking about my interests. And then I ate the chocolate and drank the tea.
I don’t know, I thought I had a plan for what I was going to say, but apparently not.
I can’t tell if anyone was even there. I will assume yes, but there’s no way to know for sure.
This time I wrote some things down. I felt a bit silly reading from a script, but that’s better than totally fumbling it.
I introduced myself again, this time properly. I talked a little bit about what my goals in life are. I wasn’t just reading the whole thing; I added things too, but having the main points written down helped a lot.
I had a question too, but I don’t have a god-radio, so I’m not sure how to get an answer. I wanted to try a pendulum but was too tired, so I put that off until the next day.
Tried the pendulum, it didn’t work. I tried waiting a bit and asked again, still nothing.
I don’t know if pendulums are just not my thing, or if no one was listening, or if the thing I used just doesn’t make a good pendulum. (I used a necklace.)
I didn’t feel like trying again that night, since it was already late and I was tired. I may try again some other day, but I’m not very hopeful.
Honestly, I wasn’t expecting much communication, and I’m fine with the Netjeru being quiet for the most part. I can just live my life, share meals, and talk to them even if I don’t hear back from them.
Since I don’t have a god-radio, I don’t want to ask questions unless it’s absolutely necessary. But this is something I really need to know, so it’s kind of frustrating that I’m not getting an answer.
So that’s where I am right now.